fourty-nine

feel like dying..
idk how does this feelin suddenly came from
i just hope time wil freeze at this moment..
i really hope it wil just pause a second
or build me a time machine to just go back an hour back
i hate it..
and i am hating myself..
i felt i have done something wrong..
idk why i'll get the email..
i am sry for gettin it..
idk why it must be me..
i cannt think of any valid reasons..
why must it be me..
i felt totally lost now..
i cant think straight..
can someone just.......
though the path is full of obstacles
i hope i can face it..

I have my feet in 2 places,

I’m walking down 2 paths and these 2 paths don’t seem to be converging in the yellow woods,

or the leafless woods if you may, nor is it diverging.

Nor are they parallel,

the paths are just…there.

With my right foot in one and left in the other.

I know it is early,

I know I’m in the formation of great things to come.

I can’t help but to want to see the results, to read the slip of paper telling me of my future, directing me.

I hate to be confused,

I hate to feel guilty for the confusion and

I hate it even more that I can’t do anything about it.

dont walk behind me ,
dont walk in front of me either,
walk beside me..
am feeling sked..
i think it is time to take one step at a time..
i am no superman..
i am just an ordinary human..
i'll get tired at some time..